Physical Touch - The Generous Husband

Love in the Pews: Ripple Effect of Affection in Church

by The Generous Husband | Jan 13, 2025 | Grass-roots Movement, Physical Touch

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We usually sit up front at church. But yesterday we arrived just before the service started, and the front was full, so we ended up close to the back.

I was looking at the folks in front of me during the sermon, and I noticed a number of married couples sitting close, or one with their arm around the other, or a hand on a leg.

It seems showing love for your spouse is a cultural norm there. That’s great, it encourages others to do the same. It may also nudge those who are not as loving. Perhaps it could even cause someone to think they should work on their marriage.

Public displays of attention aren’t just for you and your wife. They have the power to effect other couples in a good way.

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More of This and Less of That

by The Generous Husband | Dec 2, 2024 | Physical Touch, Simple Ideas

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Most marriages I know could use more hugs. And some desperately need more hugs!

What’s more, most marriages I know would benefit from less criticism. And some won’t survive without less criticism.

So why not commit to more hugging, and less criticising?

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The Power of Touch: Strengthening Your Marriage with Physical Connection

by The Generous Husband | Sep 2, 2024 | Physical Touch, Simple Ideas, YOU4HER

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How often do you give your wife little touches? Hold her hand, pat her, put your arm around her, and so on?

Touch is powerful. It releases hormones and brain chemicals that can make both of you feel calmer and more connected. And a steady drip of that will, over time, have a profound positive effect on your marriage.

Make it a habit to touch her many times a day.

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More Cuddling Could Improve Your Marriage and Sex Life

by The Generous Husband | Jan 18, 2024 | Audio, Good Marriage, Physical Touch, ZIMAGE

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So some researchers decided to find out how more cuddling would affect married couples. A group was asked to spend more time cuddling through some combination of cuddling more often and doing it for longer periods. Two other groups were asked to spend more time together at meals, and to make no changes, as control groups.

The more cuddling group reported greater relationship satisfaction and less interest in other people after four weeks. Cuddling was defined as intimate, physical, and loving contact with some degree of whole body touching that doesn’t involve sexual behaviour.

The study also mentioned that previous research had shown that post intercourse affection, including cuddling, was associated with greater relationship satisfaction and sexual satisfaction.

So if you want to improve your marriage, do more cuddling. If you want to improve your marriage and your sex life, do more cuddling after sex.

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Give Your Wife a Massage for No Reason

by The Generous Husband | Sep 18, 2023 | Audio, Her Needs, Physical Touch, Simple Ideas, ZIMAGE

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It’s been a while since I encouraged you to massage your wife. Her hands, feet, shoulders, back, butt, legs, whatever. Just rub her!

If you have learned where she carries tension, work on that. Learn what muscles get sore, and how to make them feel better. Also learn how to do a light massage that brings pleasure and relaxes without any discomfort.

If sex is a problem area for you two, keep your massage away from where you really want to touch her. Giving her touch with no sexual strings is a loving choice.

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Hug It Better

by The Generous Husband | Mar 13, 2023 | Audio, Links to good stuff, Physical Touch, Simple Ideas, ZIMAGE

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Remember when your kid’s minor injuries could be fixed by “kissing it better”? And disappointment and fear could be fixed with a hug. The power behind those things was you letting the child know you loved and cared for them.

This power works for adults too, and it’s especially good with your wife. A hug won’t change or fix anything, but it will make her feel better to know you love and care for her.

A post worth reading:

PsyPost | Psychologists developed a new measure of sexual anxiety sensitivity. It predicts some important sex-related outcomes. ◄ A woman may react negatively to getting aroused.

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Sex Is Good For Your Marriage

by The Generous Husband | Oct 8, 2022 | Audio, Physical Touch, Series, Sex Positive, ZIMAGE

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Helen Fisher’s third way of leveraging neurochemistry to maintain romantic love and form a deep attachment in long-term relationships is to have regular sex and other physical contact. These things increase levels of the hormone oxytocin.

Oxytocin has been called the love hormone. Calling it the bonding hormone would be more accurate. It makes us feel close and connected and builds trust. Hugging and cuddling release oxytocin. So does holding hands or rubbing her back. Playing with her nipples gives her oxytocin, the thrusting of intercourse releases it, and orgasm gives you a big shot.

Oxytocin causes bonding, the creation of group memories, and romantic attachment. It facilitates relaxation, trust, and feeling stable and safe. It also reduces stress and anxiety. Higher levels of oxytocin mean strong erections and more powerful ejaculation and orgasm. This is why foreplay makes sex better. Recent research suggests oxytocin increases faithfulness and it may make it easier to say no to food if one is trying to lose weight. Oxytocin also seems to lead to better sleep. If you and/or your wife sleep better after sex, this could be why.

The picture is far more complex than what I have said here and science is still unpacking it. But doing things that give you both a dose of oxytocin is good for your marriage in a number of ways.

BTW, don’t waste the oxytocin from sex. Use the “afterglow” to build your relationship.

A post worth reading:

Hot, Holy & Humorous | How “Maintenance Sex” Can Bless Your Marriage ◄ A woman saying that sometimes you need to schedule time to just do it.

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Touch Is a Loving Act

by The Generous Husband | Oct 3, 2022 | Audio, Her Needs, Physical Touch, YOU4HER, ZIMAGE

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As Lori went through the whole diagnosis, investigation, and surgery associated with her uterus being a real bitch to her, I touched her a great deal.

I touched her hand to comfort her when she was worried. Or I gave her a long hug. I held her and rubbed her back in bed. When she was having a biopsy without anaesthesia and it started to hurt, I moved to where I could hold her hand. And when she came out of anaesthesia after the hysterectomy I held her hand, rubbed her feet, and stroked her arm.

Touch is reassuring and comforting. Studies have shown it reduces pain and speeds healing. And while it’s harder to research, touch does the same for mental and emotional pain.

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