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We’ve talked about how men want to fix things. We are all about action, and doing something makes us feel good about ourselves.
So, an honest question: Have you ever been so desperate to do something you did something that was useless, stupid, or destructive? Or is that just me?
Actually, I know it’s not just me, because I’ve seen it in other men. And I’ve seen the fall-out from it in marriages Lori and I have worked with. Doing something, anything, feels better than doing nothing. So even though we don’t fully understand the situation, and have no idea how our actions will play you, we may go crashing in.
I’m coming to realise this natural urge is not a good thing. As difficult as it can be, sometime the best option is to do nothing. What’s more, sometimes doing nothing is the only smart choice.
Would your life, or your marriage, benefit from you being able to do nothing on some occasions?
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I don’t feel like fessing up, but….yes, been there. And on the flip side, a lot of the counseling I do with brothers and sisters in Christ is along the beginnings of the modern versions of the Hippocratic Oath: “First, do no harm.” Asking “is this really going to help this situation” can be very confrontational, but a huge portion of the time, it’s exactly the right thing to do.
@Bert Perry – An excellent question to ask ourselves!