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Many wives are hungry for more non-sexual touch. Massage is a great way to provide that.
Start with her feet, or her hands if her feet are ticklish. Once she knows you don’t expect sex as payment, you can move on to other areas.
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We struggle with sex – a *very large* mismatch between how often I need sexual intimacy, , and what she can willingly do.
Non-sexual touch has helped bridge that gap. We are intentional about non-sexual touch, and that helps me feel connected and loved. Before we started doing this, I did not appreciate just how important non-sexual touch was to me. She started doing this for me, but discovered it was important for her too.
It does not replace sex, of course, but has helped mend or strengthen our bond. And, helps me cope with this challenge.