Breaking Free from Broken Sexual Frameworks

Podcast: Download

Subscribe RSS

Let’s talk about frameworks and sex. 

We all have a framework for sex. And most of us had a significant framework for it long before we ever had sex. By the time you were with your wife, your framework was massive and probably set in stone. 

Obviously, a couple who built their sexual frameworks together, as they explored sex with each other, would have a much better sex life. But that can’t happen in a sex obsessed society, where sexual maturity happens a decade or more before marriage. Then there’s the reality that much of most folk’s sexual framework comes directly or indirectly from porn.

If you think about it, it’s no wonder most couples have significant struggles with sex. We walk into marriage with two broken sexual frameworks that are at odds in multiple places. Even worse, we generally try to fix things by arguing which of our broken frameworks is right.

The reality is you were set up for sexual failure. And unless you’re very unusual, your sexual framework is the problem, not the answer. If you don’t realise this truth, your efforts to improve sex will go badly.

The solution is to agree you both have messed up sexual frameworks, and work on building a framework that allows both of you to enjoy sex. That could mean sacrificing things you think are necessary to be sexually satisfied. And that will be true for both of you. Start with a small, simple framework, and build on that. If you can do that, sex will get better and better. At first, it may be painfully slow, but stick with it.

Image Credit: © Paul H Byerly created with stockdreams.ai
Shop Amazon ? Shop to give links page
We’re donation supported Thanks for your help!
This post may contain affiliate links, see my disclosure for info.