Podcast: Download
Subscribe RSS
Last weekend, I attended a men’s retreat with a group of men from my church. The theme was friendship. The first speaker addressed the sad reality that most men don’t have enough friends, and possibly no close friend. And it’s getting worse at a frightening pace.
- Only 21% of US men say they get emotional support from friends every week.
- Fifteen percent of men under 30 say they don’t have a close friend. And that number has increased fivefold in the last 35 years.
- More than half of all men report feeling unsatisfied with the size of their friend groups.
- Only 27% of American men have six close friends. That is half as many as 35 years ago.
- Sixty percent of men self-describe as lonely.
Aside from this being sad, we know there are health issues that come from a lack of friends. Those without friends live shorter, less fulfilling, less happy lives. Loneliness increases the odds of cardiovascular disease as much as smoking 15 cigarettes a day! Mental health is affected even more strongly.
I’m going to pick this up one Thursday. Between now and then, think about your friendships. Who is your closest friend, other than your wife? How much time do you spend with him? Who are your six closest friends? When did you last connect with them?
A post worth reading:
Hot, Holy & Humorous | The Church on Sex: We’re Not There, But We’re Doing Better ◄ True on both counts.
Image Credit: © Paul H Byerly vis stockdreams.ai
Shop Amazon ♦ Shop to give links page
We’re donation supported Thanks for your help!
This post may contain affiliate links, see my disclosure for info.
The problem is society has created this phobia that you will be connected to a lifestyle that you don’t believe in and therefore, your male friends now have to be protected much the same way a male must protect his friendship with a female. On top of that, social media has proposed to connect people while at the same time are disconnecting people because there is no in person interaction. It causes men to feel even more alone than any time in history.
I think this has to do with general busy-ness. Men have work colleagues, most of whom are not really friends.
For me, I have found friends in my volunteer endeavors. That volunteer “work” is satisfying itself, but also provides the context for me to find like-minded friends with whom I share interests. Plus, the volunteer effort provides the opportunity to regularly engage with these friends.
My vote – go find a meaningful volunteer opportunity and dive in.
@Robert – I agree time is a big issue. And your solution is excelent!
I have no friends other than my family at the moment.
I’m not lonely.
I am not entirely sure there is any such things as friends. I feel most the time like I am being used by the so called friends. There is a song I like that has a line that reads (I don’t believe in friends because there is only a friendship present when there is a agenda present. ) I have seen this play out far too often in my life. I have stopped asking anyone for help with anything I am doing. That way I don’t owe anyone a debt to be forced upon me at a later date. Mostly I have people trying co coerce me into doing electrical work for them as I am a electrician. That is against the law for me to do that. I could loose my job and license. That is not going to happen. People also try to rope me into fixing things around their home but when I am working on something there is no one to be seen. It really is a shame but there is nothing to be done about it.