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Recently, in the comments, someone asked me about my motivation to make changes that lead to improving my marriage. That’s an interesting story…
I grew up with parents who loved each other, didn’t fight, stayed together, and had a better than average marriage. However, it wasn’t a great marriage. Honestly, I can’t say I ever saw a great marriage growing up, but I was convinced there was something far better than I had ever seen. I didn’t believe it, I knew it. I knew it beyond any doubt, and I was determined to do whatever it took to have that kind of marriage. I married a lady who didn’t share my confidence in what could be, but did share my drive to do everything possible to make it as good as possible. It wasn’t easy, but it was certainly worth it! Today we have a fantastic marriage, and it just keeps getting better.
Why was I so sure a couple could have an awesome marriage when I’d never seen it? I can only blame God; I think He put it in my heart. When and how it happened I can’t say, but I certainly knew it by the age of eighteen. As for why God put it in my heart, I think it was about more than Lori and I having a good marriage. It’s no small part of why I do what I do here and in other places around the Interweb.
My encouragement to you is this: when it comes to marriage, there’s more than you’ve seen, and more than you’ve been told. It’s not easy, but you can have an incredible marriage, and it’s well worth the effort. I pray the Lord will put the truth deep in your heart and give you the faith to seek it. In the Old Testament, the Lord likens His relationship with His chosen people to that of husband and wife. Jesus calls the Church His bride. Paul also speaks of marriage as an earthy example of what we will have with God. I realise all analogies eventually fail, but surely, God intended human marriages to be a far better example of what we have with Him than most of what we see today.
[This post first appeared July 29, 2012.]
Image Credit: © Paul H Byerly via stockdreams.ai
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Thank you for sharing! I would love to have a “fantastic marriage” as well! I wonder if you might be willing to do a post (or a response would be just fine too!) on what specifically makes your marriage fantastic for you? It would help to think of tangible areas to target in my own marriage. Thanks!
@Yun Aiseng – I’ll think on it. I mean, I know why I feel my marriage is fantastic, but some of that isn’t important to other folks, and some of what others want I don’t care about. I will try to come up with underlying ideas that lead to both of us having what we want and need.
I’m very glad you followed your call. Your marriage is an inspiration both now and for eternity. If my marriage so far was all I had as an example of what eternity with God would be like, I would be much less motivated to make it. Having good examples of what marriage can be and is meant to be really helps and I am grateful. May the Lord richly bless you both as you minister and help so many who are hurting and need the hope you live out before us.