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I have a love hate thing going with the website Your Tango. Occasionally they have an article that is good and could help couples. But all too often, the articles treat couples as one size fits all. Even worse, some of it is just rubbish, like wanting to “normalise divorce” or claims you can divorce proof your marriage in “3 simple steps”.
So it was refreshing to see a great article by licenced psychotherapists Linda and Charlie Bloom. What jumped out at me was them saying nearly all successful couples in healthy relationships have the capacity to not only see the beauty and goodness in each other, but to reflect it back to one another on an ongoing basis.
There are two powerful things that happen when you reflect the good you see in your wife back to her. First, it makes her feel good. She feels seen and appreciated. It’s hard to be mad at a guy who reflects the good in you, and easy to forgive his small imperfections.
Secondly, it helps your wife see things about herself to which she is blind. None of us sees ourselves clearly, and sometimes we ignore or downplay the good that we do. If your wife struggles to see how wonderful she is, your regularly showing her how she is wonderful is a huge blessing.
Image Credit: © alones | stock.adobe.com
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