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Given the need to feed, clothe, and provide shelter for our families, earning income must be a high priority. Sometimes that means putting the demands of the job ahead of the desires of the family – better to miss some event than to be unemployed. That said, our job can become a tyrant doing harm to our wife, kids, health, and life in general. The issue is one of balance. How you balance work will depend on what you and your wife want for your lives.
If you place a high priority on things costing a lot of money, you need to make more income than if you find time together to be more important than things. If you’re willing to live in a smaller house, drive an older car, take smaller vacations, and not own every new iDevice the day it comes out, you can work a less demanding job. However, if you want more, your job will have to pay more, which usually means more demands on your time.
Personally, I’m coming to see “things” as overrated, but I’m not trying (too hard) to convince you of that. What I do want is for you and your wife to agree on how much you want. If you’re working many hours, and she wants more of your time, you’re at cross-purposes. The same is true if you want a simple life and she wants a fancy life. Have a long talk about this issue, and make sure you’re on the same page. Then look to adjust your income production accordingly.
“Nobody on their deathbed has ever said, ‘I wish I had spent more time at the office’.” ~ Rabbi Harold Kushner
[This post first appeared June 29, 2012.]
Image Credit: © kreus | stock.adobe.com
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My job eats most of my time. I don’t know what I can do as i am a electrician and have to go where i am sent. My current job starts at 6 am and is 1.5 hrs from home so i get up at 3:50am pack a lunch and leave. When we are doing 12hr days i get home at 7:45pm just in time to wash the dishes from dinner and start bedtime with my son. The wife and son have already eaten and i may or may not get dinner. I take a shower and go to bed hopefully by 9:30pm. It leaves no time for anything. Fortunately i just paid off our house and i don’t need much but tend to hord money as you never know when the next layoff is coming.
@Bumble – It’s always a difficult thing to balance. I knew a fellow who worked 1,000 plus miles from his family – wife and two teenage boys. He saw them one weekend every other month. He did this so they could keep living the same lifestyle. I think that is going too far – he could have downsized his life and live with his family.