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Recently, Gretchen Rubin of The Happiness Project wrote a post about false choices. Do You Fall into This Happiness Trap? The False Choice. I like the term “false choice” better than the more commonly used false dichotomy. Regardless of what you call it, a false choice is one of the following:
- You think you must do one of two things. In reality, there are one or more other valid choices.
- You see multiple choices, but not all the choices.
- You think you can only do one of two things, when in fact you can do both.
Sometimes we build our own false choices. Sometimes others give us false choices – either because it is how they see things, or as an attempt to manipulate us.
If you make a habit of challenging the choices given, you will often find another way – a third alternative – that is better than either/any of the choices originally presented. Also, learn to question why you must have one or the other, maybe you can have or do both.
I’ll leave you to mull that over, and give some more marriage specific examples over the next few weeks.
[This post first appeared June 18, 2012.]
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