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This is a follow-up of sorts on Tuesday’s Becoming Your Authentic Self: Embracing God’s Design.
God tells us to tell the truth in love. The love part of that is neither an afterthought nor is it optional. If you can’t tell the truth in love, then you should keep your mouth shut. Truth without love is not better than nothing, it is wrong.
I say this as someone who would have argued with that last sentence in the past. I thought the truth was so important, it should be shared regardless. In my mind, telling the truth with love when you can was the right way to go.
Over the years, I have realised there are at least two problems with that approach. First, it’s not biblical. Second, it doesn’t work. Confronting what someone believes is a hard thing. No one want to be told they are wrong, and it’s human nature to look for a way to push away truths we don’t like. When a truth is shared in a harsh or belittling way, the attitude behind it becomes the excuse to reject it. Sharing truth in love doesn’t make it pleasant for the one receiving it, but it sure makes it easier to consider what has been said.
And of course, this is especially true in your marriage. If you want your wife to hear you, sharing in love is critical. This can be difficult when it’s an ongoing situation or something that impacts you a great deal. But if you want your wife to accept the truth and make changes based on it, you must share the truth in love.
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