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I know that many women are frustrated or offended because their husband only wants sex for physical pleasure. However, I can’t find all these men who only want sex for the orgasm. Frankly, if men only cared about having an orgasm, the human race would be extinct. We can give ourselves that any time we like!
I do, however, understand why so many women think their guy only cares about having an orgasm.
Part of it is that men are way more focused on the physical than the average woman. Beyond that, how we communicate about sex can give the wrong impression. If all you talk about is the physical, and you sound like you’re all about coming, you can see why she would think that’s all you care about.
Listen to what you say about sex. Listen to how you ask for sex and what you say when you talk about how great sex was. Be especially aware of how you joke about sex. Look for ways you might be unintentionally communicating that you only care about the physical side of sex. Think about the other reasons you enjoy sex. Then, figure out how to change your sexual dialogue to better communicate to your wife what sex with her means to you.
[This post first appeared Mar 17, 2012.]
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