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Dr. Laura tells women men are simple, saying “If he’s not horny, make him a sandwich.“
I think that’s a bit of an exaggeration, but if you put the things men want from their wives on a pie chart, I suspect the top two would take up more than half the space. If you did the same for women, it would take a dozen or more to hit 50%.
This means you need to stop looking for the one or two things you have to get right to make her feel loved and cared for. It may also be why she has such a difficult time understanding why sex is so important to you – because no single thing in her life is that important to her.
I suspect this is a gender difference based on how God made us, but regardless of why it’s true, it’s usually true. So you have to figure out what her long list of needs includes and do a decent job of hitting a whole lot of them for her to feel the way you would feel if she was nailing it in bed.
The good news in this is you can blow it on a few things and still be okay. She has a few things that are critical, but if you can do well on most of the rest of her list you’re in good standing. So know what’s critical, but don’t stop with that.
A post worth reading:
Dr. Corey | When our Promised Land is no cakewalk ◄ A post that, unfortunately, applies to some marriages.
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Sex is not what I require,
I ain’t in the mood.
Skip the going-out attire,
beer’s my favoured food.
Please don’t do a pole dance
in front of the TV,
’cause you will increase the chance
that I’ll miss Tom Brady.
You say that this isn’t how
a marriage is supposed to be,
but leapin’ lizards, holy cow,
what do you want from me,
Hugh Grant channeling Fred Astaire?
Look, have a Bud…see, I’ll share!
I once was teaching a young marrieds Sunday school class and I told the women, “If you keep him well fed and well sexed, he will be happy.” Nowdays I would add well respected to that, but everyone seemed to agree with me.
I’m reminded about the old joke line: “They say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Wrong….try about six inches lower!” 😁
I’d say very true in my case. 😉
I don’t need anyone to cook for me. I am a much better cook/ chef then my wife is. I don’t ask her to do anything for me. The only thing I can’t do myself is sex. The list of things she expects or demands from me is endless.