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A couple of weeks ago I was being internally grumpy about a place where my wife has not yet achieved perfection. And as I was setting up social media for the next day, the following was slated to run:
How you react to your spouse’s brokenness isn’t about them or their brokenness; it’s about you and your brokenness! #MarriageTip
I wrote that a couple of years earlier, and it just happened to come up then. Clearly, God thinks He’s funny.
Being hoisted on my own petard aside, I think there’s a great deal of truth in that. I suppose the fact I hadn’t said anything to Lori on that occasion suggests I’m less broken than I used to be. But my internal reaction was not what it should have been.
Like all of us, my lovely wife has been beaten up by life. Because of that she has broken places. Of course, she has far fewer of those than she did when we got married because she has consistently worked on healing. I know what hasn’t been fully dealt with and I know why she is broken in those places. I’m usually very understanding and extremely grateful she has done so much healing. My less than ideal reaction that evening was either about my past and my brokenness or because I’d had a rough day.
Your wife has broken places. You also have broken places. You can choose to love her despite her injuries and you can work hard to keep your brokenness from making her life more difficult. As a friend of mine says when his kids leave, “Make good choices”!
Image Credit: © Kevin Carden | stock.adobe.com
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They say that I am broken,
that it’s no shame to groan
as an honest token,
but, dude, I stand alone
undefeated on the field,
standing straight and tall,
heedless of the call to yield
for I will win it all,
never backing down or turning,
never down to take a knee.
Sure, my world is really burning,
but when others look at me
they’ll see a giant on the Earth
who takes each day to prove his worth.