A study done a few months ago suggests that our brains get desensitised to dishonesty when we lie. The more dishonest we are, the easier it is for us to be dishonest. This could then result in an increase in our level of dishonesty.
I realise most of you don’t make a practice of lying to your wife, but what about not telling the truth? While withholding the truth is not lying, it is a form of dishonesty. Does withholding the truth desensitise us to dishonesty? If it does, the few things we don’t share could gradually become the many things we don’t share. The less we share the less intimate we are, and that’s bad for both spouses and the marriage.
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So true, Paul. The habit of this kind of withdrawal is a hard one to break.
I know I do it; when I’m clearly too ill to give my usual “Good to go!” when asked how I’m feeling, my answer is always “Could be worse. I could be slow, soft and ugly.”
Not admitting to pain, weakness and fear may be good for me, but it pushes away those – like my wife! – who WANT to care. It becomes hard to really care for someone who seems to want to become a caricature of himself.
http://blessed-are-the-pure-of-heart.blogspot.com/2016/12/your-dying-spouse-241-when-caregiver.html